Your busted!

So at work the other day a friend of mine, who was once the lab safety officer, approched me and asked if I was interest in filling her shoes as the new safety officer. (She had stepped down from that role because of a shift change) My immediate thought was "No way! I'm so busy at work that I can't even find time to use the restroom. How the heck am I going to now also, in addition to all the other tasks I have, find time to enforce the rules of safety?"

Well a few days passed, and I was called into my supervisor's office. I was sat down and explained that the previous safety office had to "resign" (as if elected or something), and my name was brought up in conversation as a potentially good candidate to replace her. The meeting started off as any meeting of this nature might. A simple description of the job and its duties was relayed to me. I was told what was involved with being an "officer of the safe work environment" and other things that would be expected if I were to decide to do it. I thought I could see the end of the meeting before it even came..."Think about it and let us know".

But then, out of nowhere, the greatest sales switch of all time was pulled, and the next thing I knew, I was back at the bench and the announcement was made that I was the new safety officer for the lab! Wait a minute...I didn't even get a chance to say yes or no...I wasn't even given a choice! I remember leaving the supervisors office dumbfounded and speechless upon hearing the words, "So anyway, thanks for volunteering, I will let the EHS manager know you are the new safety officer."

Sweet mary! Me, the safety officer! Oh and the best part of being the new safety officer...I get to hand out tickets!! Heck yes! Now I just need a badge (or sash, because lets face it, I'm just the laboratory version of a junior high Hall Monitor), a helmet, some sweet aviator glasses, and a book to keep the tickets in! Look out lab workers...Brian is on the case now...!!!

My first duty as "Safety Officer"...we had a fire drill the other day, and it was my job to grab the clipboard of workers, usher everyone out the the pond, and call role. Yep, people actually said "present"...it was awesome!

All-in-all...it shoudn't be too bad...I plan to be the best safety officer in the history of laboratories world wide! But you better wear your gloves, coat and face shield, or the tickets are comin' out!